Having to wake up for classes that start at 8 in the morning has always been a bitch for me since i started college in 2006. But waking for class last wednesday(17.9.08) was a real pain in the arse due to the fact that i was up until 4.30 watching football, i still dont know why they have to play all their european games during the weekday and not the weekends.Even that i still stay up to watch every champions league game that liverpool plays, i cant explain why i do it but i just do.

So during this class we finished the last bit of non-verbal communication where we watched a few clips from tv episodes. Next we started a new chapter, interpersonal communication. through out the class i felt it was a bit slow except the part where the word intimacy came up and the lecturer was asking people in the classroom to define what it means and this clever boy who goes by the name of clement said "into you i see" which was what Guru Pitka a.k.a Mike Myers in the movie The Love Guru.That bit got my full attention..... im saying this with the full knowledge knowing my lecturer will be reading this in the days to come.

And then came this part of the chapter about The Developmental Perspective,Mark Knapp Model, which i found quite interesting. It shows us the stages in a relationship from the start to the end of it.
It start at the coming together stage:
initiating
experimenting
intensifying
then the relational maintenance stage:
intergrating
bonding
differentiating
circumscribing
and then the coming apart stage:
stagnating
avoiding
terminating

How nice it would be if we could skip the coming together stage and go straight to the relational maintenance stage and stay there without worrying about the coming apart bit.


__jiawei__

Non verbal communication can be anything from expressions, to body language, and and paralinguistic! and of course there are many more.

Just picking up and moving in to another direction from my last post, we will look at the female and male's body language when it comes to flirting. Hehe :P

Body Language is actually a nonverbal communication expressed by posture, stance, and bodily movement.

In general, these are the type of the body language expressed when one is falling in love.
( Note to people: Please dont take this too seriously. It might not be all true for everyone and i wont be held responsible if anything you take from this blows up in your face! :D )

• Smiling more and longer

If you have noticed that your special someone is smiling at you more or if the smile lingers for a while, then he or she is probably falling for you.

• Laughing more

You might realize that your mate has suddenly started laughing at more of your jokes and funny expressions. This is a sign that he or she is paying more attention to you and is appreciating you much more than before falling in love with you.

• Touching more

When talking, does your significant other touch you on the shoulder or hand in comfort much more? Touching the small part of your back if you are girl while walking through an entrance or hugging more are two other signs.

• Staring

People who have fallen in love with someone have a hard time concentrating on other people and things; you may catch your special someone staring at you out of the corner of your eye. This person may have a smile on his or her face and turn away quickly.

Now to narrow things a little.

These are the signs that a guy might be flirting with you. I just picked a few which i found interesting.

• Hands on hips - Guys instinctively will try to make themselves look bigger. This masculine approach is supposed to be link to mans ancestry to ward off competition and impress the female. combined with hooking the thumbs behind his belt can be pulled off by a confident male.
• Lend you his coat or jacket - Chivalry is still alive, just perhaps less noticeable nowadays. A great sign of flirting with a very personable touch. We know girls who would die for this to happen. A little favourite of girls in case you guys are interested.(Haha, i was shocked when i read this. It reminded me of someone, who? no need to know. Maybe its a sign as for all day for me to read this , it just had to be today! WOW!) ( If your wondering what i'm talking about and still dont know then your just not meant to know :P)
  
• Whisper and lean - A very good flirting technique to 'test' the waters as well. Girls love a secret and find the intimacy quite inviting with the right guy.
• Engages in direct eye contact.
• Casually touches you.

Now, signs of a girl possibly flirting with you.

• She keeps glancing over - Its human nature we keep looking towards who we are attracted to. The trick is to find out as some girls can be prone to avoid the one they are attracted to. Of course they cannot make it easy for you guys. So don't despair if you can't see her looking initially - she may be without you knowing!. (Haha, Im sure many girls can relate to this)
  
• Crossing and uncrossing her legs - This is great flirting language. Look for the other great move of her straightening her skirt yet showing a little more leg. (Haha. I can tell you now it doesnt always apply! Cause i like crossing and uncrossing my legs whether it's during a meal or in class!)
• Accidentally brushes past you - We both have seen this one so many times at the speed dating events, especially later in the night. We are amazed how many times guys do not pick up on it though. You have to be aware of everything happening!(Yeah people! Wake up, Realise! dont la be so Blur!)
• Casually touches to your arm, shoulder, thigh, or hand. (All i can say is, whoppsss! :P)

Reference:
1) LoveToKnow, 2008, Body Language When Falling In Love, online, retrieved 18 September 2008, from http://dating.lovetoknow.com/Body_Language_When_Falling_in_Love

2) Romance Stuck, 2008, Man's Guide to Flirting, online, retrieved 18 September 2008, from http://www.romancestuck.com/flirting/mans-guide-to-flirting.htm

3) Romance Stuck, 2008, Woman's Guide to Flirting, online, retrieved 18 September 2008, from http://www.romancestuck.com/flirting/womans-guide-to-flirting.htm

4) Top Flirting Tips, 2007, Male Body Language, online, retrieved 18 September 2008, from http://www.top-flirting-tips.com/male-body-language.html

i am not sure whether this post is related to human comm or not, but it is very interesting. so go ahead and read it.

1. I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you

2. No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry.

-marcia-