Since it Raya, and will be until the end of the month! I'm just going to blog a little on Asian cultures and customs(mostly Malay) and will try to relate them back to human communication.

As cultures affect the verbal (language) and non-verbal (body language/attire), people of different culture will speak and act differently.Thus, we have to be aware of these differences and try not to say or do anything that will offend them, and if you do, please quickly apologize.

According to our Human Communication textbook: Non-verbal communication is the oral and non-oral messages expressed by other than linguistic means. It can either be through written words, gestures, movements, appearance, facial expression and more.

Now comparing between us (Asians) ,Westerners, Middle Easterners and a few more in this few different aspects:

• Posture

Consider the following actions and note cultural differences:

• Bowing (not done, criticized, or affected in US; shows rank in Japan)
• Slouching (rude in most Northern European areas)
• Hands in pocket (disrespectful in Turkey)
• Sitting with legs crossed (offensive in Ghana, Turkey)
• Showing soles of feet. (Offensive in Thailand, Saudi Arabia)

• Gestures

Impossible to catalog them all. But need to recognize:

1) incredible possibility and variety and

2) that an acceptable in one’s own culture may be offensive in another.


E.g: Pointing : US with index finger; Germany with little finger; Japanese with entire hand (in fact most Asians consider pointing with index finger to be rude).

• Facial Expressions

While some say that facial expressions are identical, meaning attached to them differs. Majority opinion is that these do have similar meanings world-wide with respect to smiling, crying, or showing anger, sorrow, or disgust. However, the intensity varies from culture to culture. Note the following:

• Many Asian cultures suppress facial expression as much as possible.
• Many Mediterranean (Latino / Arabic) cultures exaggerate grief or sadness while most American men hide grief or sorrow.

• Eye Contact and Gaze

In USA, eye contact indicates: degree of attention or interest, influences attitude change or persuasion, regulates interaction, communicates emotion, defines power and status, and has a central role in managing impressions of others.

• Western cultures — see direct eye to eye contact as positive (advise children to look a person in the eyes). But within USA, African-Americans use more eye contact when talking and less when listening with reverse true for Anglo Americans. This is a possible cause for some sense of unease between races in US. A prolonged gaze is often seen as a sign of sexual interest.
• Arabic cultures make prolonged eye-contact. — believe it shows interest and helps them understand truthfulness of the other person. (A person who doesn’t reciprocate is seen as untrustworthy)
• Japan, Africa, Latin American, Caribbean — avoid eye contact to show respect.

Those are only some, there are many more but as we all know, there are so many different cultures in the world. It would be too long to post all.

Let's talk about Raya a little, or Malay culture in general.

The way we Malays (Muslims) give a handshake (bersalam) is different from how any other people from different culture give a handshake. Especially if its between a younger and an elderly person.




More on handshakes: Comparing Btwn Countries

England

In England, a handshake is standard for business occasions and when visiting a home. Women do not necessarily shake hands. A woman may extend her hand; men should wait for women to do so.

Australia and Mexico
It is the custom to shake hands at the beginning and end of a meeting. Women will often give a kiss on the cheek in greeting. Men may wait for women to initiate a handshake.

Malaysia
With younger or foreign-educated Malaysian, a handshake is the most common form of greeting. The standard Malaysian handshake is more of a hand clasp; it is rather limp and lasts for some ten or twelve seconds. Often both hands will be used. In Malaysia,
Westernised women may shake hands with both men and women.. Malaysian businessmen usually wait for a woman to offer her hand. It is perfectly acceptable for a women to simply nod upon an introduction rather than offering her hand. Women should offer their hands only upon greeting; too-frequent handshaking is easily
misinterpreted as an amorous advance. But men shake hands both on greeting and on departure. Ethnic Malays are generally Muslim.

Traditionally, there is no physical contact between Muslim men and women. Malaysian Chinese are generally comfortable shaking hands with both men and women. Many Malay Indians are Hindu. Most Hindus avoid public contact between men and women. The traditional Indian greeting involves a slight bow with the palms of the hands together (as if praying).

South Africa
Remember that an "African Handshake" is used between blacks and whites and blacks and blacks. To do this, shake hands and, without letting go, slip your hand around the other person's thumb; then go back to the traditional handshake.

Whites do not use this handshake with other whites. Afrikaaners and whites of both sexes shake hands when introduced. With good friends of opposite sexes: men kiss women on one cheek. Men greet close male friends with a handshake or a hug. In greeting men in a business setting, women should nod or shake hands.

Okay, so I know you know some of the things i just stated, but just showing how even a simple handshake can have it's differences, so imagine other slightly more complicated gestures. How much they can differ even in ONE COUNTRY! for example our beloved country Malaysia.

Reference:
1) Andrew's University, 2008, Non-verbal Communication Modes, online, retrieved on 5th October 2008, from http://www.andrews.edu/~tidwell/bsad560/NonVerbal.html

2) Global Connections Training, 2005, Cross Culture Notes, online, retrieved on 5th October 2008, from http://www.globalconnectionstraining.ca/resources_notes.html

3) FreeDigitalPhotoe.net, 2008, A normal handshake, online, retrieved on 5th October 2008, from http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/details.php?gid=93&sgid=&pid=1104

4) ONE_UMMAH90, 2008, A handshake btwn a younger and an elderly person, online, retrieved on 5th October 2008, from http://suara-ummah.blogspot.com/2008/04/hukum-berjabat-tangan.html

5) Jabatan Pembangunan Masyarakat, Kementerian Kebudayaan Belia dan Sukan, 2008, A handsake between 2 muslims, online, retrieved on 5th October 2008, from http://www.japem.gov.bn/BIsyarat/Ucapan%20Ringkas.htm